Monday 15 June 2009

Newcastle Don't Want Curbishley


What? Newscastle United don't want Alan Curbishley as their new manager? I always knew the carToons Board were a bit mad but now they seem to have taken complete leave of their senses. How can a club like the Barcodes afford to ignore the claims of Curbishley, a man whose record is beyond question?

Newcastle have not won a trophy in God knows how many years (Early 1970s Fairs Cup wasn't it?)and neither has Curbishley. So instead of the crazy surge in expectation that accompanies the appointment of any Newscastle manager, if Alan were appointed, everybody would be resigned to things continuing much as they have done for the last 40 or so years. Curbishley could sweep into Newcastle promising a "year of two of consolidation" before building towards a sustained period of mid table mediocrity.

All ridiculous notions of playing exciting flowing football could be consigned to the rubbish bin overnight because Alan knows only too well that attacking play can leave you open at the back. Why pass ten times when a simple lump from your centre half can put you in the position where, if it falls to one of your players, you might have a shot on goal? Let's face it, if the ball is in the opposition half, and better still so high in the air that it is almost in orbit, then you can't concede can you?

Better still, by appointing Curbishley, Newcastle could possibly trigger a return to the fold of a host of old favourites. Bowyer, Dyer, Solano, Bellyache...you can bet your overdraft that Curbishley would do his best to sign all of them. And we all know how Newcastle fans idolise a returning hero! Then there are Davenport and Quashie, mysteriously deemed surplus to requirements by new West Ham manager Gianfranco Zola - surely they could do a job in the Fizzy Pop? And who knows, Alan might use his powers of persuasion to entice Freddie Lungburst back into the English game. Curbishley knows from his time with Eggert that a fool and his money are easily parted so he would fit in perfectly at Newcastle!

It seems to me that Curbishley and Newcastle would be a marriage made in heaven. He could guarantee the Geordies mid table obscurity for the next 20 or so years. So what that it would be in the Fizzy Pop? Alan knows that stability and certainty and consolidation are what counts. Shearer? What does he know about winning nothing?

11 comments:

Hammersfan said...

Here we got again, attacking Curbishley for no good reason. He is West Ham through and through and saved us from relegation you fool. You can't be a Hammer, Hammers love their own. I bet you would sell your own mother. Twat.

Anonymous said...

I really have lost all respect for you. From when your making a blog, an predicting what people will say i think it is time to hang up your boots.

Hammersfan said...

In view of the great esteem that I hold you in, I will stop writing this blog forthwith! Not! Look how quickly you replied! The post went live, you replied! Do you sit all day in front of your computer thinking, any minute, any minute, any minute...and then I'll tell him! Get a life mate! You should have been at Lords yesterday watching the Twenty20. Rounders but a great day out!

Colm said...

Says you Hammersfan,Do you sit all day in front of your computer thinking, any minute, any minute, any minute...the media will have a curbishly story for me to have another silly go at him again! Get a life mate! You should have been at Lords yesterday watching the Twenty20. Rounders but a great day out!

Anonymous said...

To be honest i was unaware when you made the blog, and just happened to be revising when i went on newsnow. And talking of quick replies, you made the blog at 14:19, saw my reply at 14:48, and replied only 8 minutes later. Does that not make you just as bad as myself? Im guessing at 19 im alot younger than you are, and in times of post-modernity i can watch twenty20 on my television, amazing isn't it!

Anonymous said...

Can't stand Sheffield United but I can't stand this blog just as much!

Hammersfan said...

Revising? What you revising for? (eg qualification / subject).

Colm, I was at Lords yesterday, sat right alongside a large Indian contingent who only turned up after the Sri Lanka v Ireland game finished. Fabulous fun but nowt to do with cricket!

Anonymous said...

I don't think what i am revising has any relevance to what the blog is about, therefore i will stop bothering you and your website which is 40% interesting 60% irrelevant. Cya

supernumbersix said...

Anon 15:28 Simple - don't read it.

Good day out then HF?? Nice weather for it yesterday.

Hammersfan said...

It was brilliant mate. Great company, TOO much gin and beer, great laugh, lovely curry afterwards. We missed last train home and had to get a taxi. Wife not amused and my body is in utter rebellion today!

Anonymous said...

MPD